Crime: Type 1 diabetes

I started chatting with a new diabuddy on Facebook last night who was telling me all about Dr. Denise Faustman's BCG Tuberculosis vaccine to cure diabetes.

I had heard of it before, but my reaction was always the same... sounds awesome but let it be a real cure where I can go in there take a shot and pack up Dexie, Rosie, my bg meter, along with all other D related supplies and say... "I used to have diabetes"

This time I was really excited.  I understood, from our convo not from any research I had done personally, that if this worked for a few years we would have a cure by 2022. I was elated! I would be cured by 2022? OMG sign me up!

But then I read up on it and there seems to be no proof that the participants from phase I were taken off insulin. Phase II will end in 2022, and we won't know if it's working until then. I'm not willing to hype myself up for 8 years just to be told... "my bad, you got the placebo," or "sorry, the results are inconclusive,  we need another 5 years" blah blah... you get what I mean.

My attitude after reading up on this research was "oh well, I've been doing this for 19 years, I can do it for the rest of my life. Just Live Long & Bolus!"

But when I woke up this morning with a low at 5:58am I felt like a train wreck. ... I haven't felt this disappointed about D since the first couple of years after diagnosis. It was like..... I got pranked, the cure isn't that close. Big pharma will probably never let it happen anyway. 

I wish I could curl up into a ball in bed and just mourn this all day. I'm entitled to it. We all are. Diabetes is hard, even though I try to make it seem easy for those around me... oh well, gotta get up because real life stuff awaits.

Here's my diabetes sentence (this is from the Free Diabetics Movement on Facebook,  they post mugshots with their sentence. Check them out!)

Crime: Type 1 Diabetes
Sentence: Life
Bail: A cure
Time Served: 19 years 10 months

She has sugar...

It was just another day at the office... Work, check blood sugar. Work some more, light up Dexie's screen to make sure all is good on the 'betes front. You all know the drill.

Then I discover treats!! Homemade Rice Krispy Treats, and I'm a sucker for Rice Krispy treats. I eat a couple.... and forget to bolus. No big deal. It happens to the best of us. We just take a correction bolus and life goes on, blood sugar goes down, blah blah blah...

This was toward the end of the day,  and when my blood sugar is high, I just can't eat.  Not because it's high, but because I'm just not hungry.

As I continue about my day, the lady who made the Rice Krispy Treats started passing the last few remaining in her tupperware. I politely declined. She tried pushing it, and I again said no.

Just then a co-worker decides to speak for me... "no, she doesn't want any... she has sugar." The Rice Krispy Treats lady's eyes widen, and she says, "oh no! Then no more for you," and walks away. I just smile while clenching my jaw.

My parents taught me to respect others, especially people older than me. And since I'm fairly new at the job, I decided to keep my mouth shut. But my blood was boiling; I wanted to tell this co-worker off!

First of all, what the *bleep* does having sugar mean?

Second of all, this is NOT the first time this person tries to be a diabetes police officer to me. Who the *bleep* gave her a carb counting, blood sugar monitoring bagde?

Third of all, I'm old enough to speak for myself. I say yes when I want to and no when I don't.  It's as simple as that.

Fourth of all, I have been living with diabetes for 2/3 of my life. I am alive. I am healthy. I have no complications. I have a decent A1C, and pretty good control of my diabetes. There is no "type zero" on this planet who can tell me what I can or cannot eat.

I understand that in her way she is just trying to watch out for me. But at the end of the day, this is my disease. I will do with it as I see fit. I know what I can or cannot do.

Finger, Y U No Bleed!!?

Today wasn't one of my best days mood-wise. I was up and down all day (mood, not blood sugar, thank God), with more downs than ups. Then I went on Twitter for a few minutes before one of my students arrived at the library and #bgbingo was on. For those of you who have never heard of #bgbingo (I just learned about it myself not too long ago), it's well, a bingo of sorts. During the weekly Wednesday night Twitter chat by #gbdoc, they call out a blood glucose number. The person who has the closest blood glucose number at the time wins a prize. The number called today around 5pm EST was 6.2 mmo/l - 112 mg/dl.

Well, I had just checked my blood sugar and it was 114 mg/dl - 6.4 mmo/l. I treated a low without going hyper (yay for me, I don't nail those very often!).  So, I tweeted my blood sugar reading and patiently waited to see if someone was closer. Someone could have possibly been 6.2 mmo/l - 112 mg/dl, 6.1 mmo/l - 111 mg/dl, or 6.3 mmo/l - 113 mg/dl. Coincidentally, my student at the time is an 8 year old boy who is very dear to me because I've known him since he was about 1 year old and his mom is one of my closest friends, and he was just diagnosed with type 1 diabetes December 2011.

Then I checked Twitter again, and guess what? I WON!! I won a Verio IQ by OneTouch. Brand New!! I was so excited, and still am. Earlier today I was looking into the Verio IQ on YouTube and it looks so nice and smart! I wanted it. And, well, I won it. That really made my day!! That and my mom educating her friend on diabetes :) . My student and his mom were very excited for me.
The GBdoc Verio IQ is set to mmo/l blood sugar readings, and since I am in the US, I use mg/dl. I really hope they can find one set to mg/dl to send to me. This was the highlight of my day :) .



Now, as for the title of my post. We all have those darned days when our fingertips refuse to bleed. You prick your finger with that little needle and nothing comes out. You've become a vampire, totally bloodless. Yep, I hate those days.

I was talking with my adopted Twitter brother about AST, Alternate Site Testing. I like using my palm. I alternate fingers and palm every day. One finger a day, or palm, to give the rest of the fingertips a rest. My Twitter brother however, could not draw blood from his palm, so he ordered an AST cap. I personally never needed those, I usually throw them out, but other people swear by them. So he tested it and still could not get any blood. Then, he read the instructions and it said to leave the pricker on palm, which he said he thought would help draw blood. And it worked for him! He got a few blood sugar checks out of his palm. Hurrah for AST.

This morning I decided to try something new with my pricker. I set it to a lower depth and pricked my finger. I left the pricker there for a few seconds, rather than prick and remove it immediately, and when I removed it there was a tiny drop of blood already. I didn't have to squeeze hard to get a sample either. It was awesome, painless, and today's finger seems much better than yesterday's or Monday's. I'm guessing that this is the proper way to check your blood sugar. Leave the pricker on site for a few seconds, then remove. Makes for much easier blood drawing, trust me...

I told my t1d student and his mom this discovery and they tried it out right there. Unbeknownst to my student, she set his pricker to a lower depth and he held his pricker there for a few seconds. He got a nice big sample out of that finger prick. His mom and I were elated that it worked.

So, point of this long blog: next time you can't draw any blood, try holding your pricker in place for a few seconds. That may help.


PS: I know that it is not called a "pricker," that it's a Lancing Device, but Lancing Device is just so boring...

Positively Diabetes

I woke up today feeling extremely positive about life and diabetes (a large part of my life is about the 'betes anyway). At 7:16 I was wide awake. No desire to curl into a ball and go back to sleep. I was totally and utterly happy! I didn't immediately roll out of bed though. I had to go do my hbA1C blood work, and since I couldn't have my usual cup o'joe, I checked in with my DOC family, then happily went to get yet another needle prick for the day. I wasn't even upset when, after parking my car and feeding the meter, I walked inside LabCorp and realized that I had forgotten the paperwork I needed at home. Who cares if it was extremely cold out? Who cares if someone takes my parking spot? Who cares if I have to take 5 minutes and drive home, pick up the paperwork, drive another 5 minutes to LabCorp and feed another meter? Life felt good. Hey, they even had stickers on the wall at LabCorp!

LabCorp 

My new insurance kicked in today! I am finally able to get new pump supplies, get blood sugar test strips for my OneTouch Ping meter for an affordable co-pay, as opposed to it costing an arm and a leg (heeehee, yea yea, bad pun, sorry!), and I could get blood work done for free (well, not free, I do pay for my insurance).

Beautiful, isn't it?

But the joys in my life now are different from three months ago. I want to jump for joy (and sometimes do) when my blood sugar stays in range, or when I carb count correctly. Yes, I wake up happy knowing I can get these things (pump supplies, blood work, test strips, see my endo!), for I took it all for granted while I had easy access to them. And while I had easy access to it all, I managed to neglect my diabetes. I won't say I was in denial. No, I always snuck in diabetes into conversations, but I just plugged in my pump and let it do the work (forehead smack). I'd bolus for very big meals, but some days I wouldn't bolus at all. Sometimes I'd check my blood sugar once a day, and sometimes once a week; I'd skip endo appointments. I know we're all "bad diabetics" from time to time, but I was a HORRIBLE diabetic for years. To be completely honest (these are my confessions, after all), I have no clue what my last a1c was, or when (but I will be sure to find out on next endo appointment).

But one day, October 20, 2012 to be exact, I woke up feeling "positively diabetes." I started checking my blood sugar multiple times that same day. I carb counted throughout the whole day. And it became that easy to be "positively diabetes." And I kept myself going, taking baby steps to get where I want to be (definitely not there, yet). I started exercising here and there and cut down tons on fast food, I even started eating broccoli! Then, I saw a Facebook post by Diabetes Social Medial Advocates about a Twitter chat on World Diabetes Day. One topic per hour, for twelve hours! I figured it wouldn't hurt to check it out.

Thus, I discovered the wonderful world of the Diabetes Online Community. I couldn't believe it! These people were like me. They felt the way I did! They "GOT" it! I was in awe. And just like that my Twitter followers began to grow, and I started following people who really had something in common with me! And I made friends. Yes, I consider you, DOC, my friends. At my darkest hours I can, and do, reach out to my Non-Diabetic friends and family members, but you guys have felt like I do, or are going through the same thing, and it helps so much! Would I have reverted back to neglecting my diabetes if I hadn't found the DOC? I can't say. What I can say is that without the DOC, the battles I fight daily would be much harder to fight.

I want to be forever "positively diabetes."